Sunday, July 24, 2011

Feeling Good

Nina Simone- Feeling Good
Muse- Feeling Good
Jennifer Hudson- Feeling Good
Michael Buble- Feeling Good

Above are links to the same song done by 4 different people. I love this song and each artist brings something different to it. The 1st one is more raw and blues like. The second one has a rock edge to it. The third one is soul and R&B at its best. The last one is the one I first heard and I love his sound no matter what he sings, but his take on the song is more dramatic as a crooner would be.

All these different takes on the song i love and kinda admire. Someone had the guts to hear this song and say I want to put my twist onto it. That takes a lot of confidence to take something on that is already good and change it. I guess the whole reason of the post today is to share this song and give a version to each person depending on what they like. Its all about feeling good, even if things don't work out you just got to remember
"It's a new dawn
It's a new day
It's a new life
For me
And I'm feeling good"

Here's Hoping your Feeling Good!!!

P.S. Funny Bonus Video

Thursday, July 21, 2011

Random Chatter

So....this coming Monday is my last day of work. I am kinda sad and happy at the same time. I know its been rough because this was a new thing for me and I had no clue what I was doing, but I know I learned a lot. I learned about myself and how to handle certain situations, plus I got to meet a bunch of amazing kids. So now I am more aware which is good and I have a month to devote to doing what I want till I head back to school.

 I got one thing accomplished with putting together this bookshelf and putting away all my books, who knew a bookshelf could make me so happy. My room looks bigger and it feels nicer. Yet, it's still cluttered with college stuff and things I don't need. My goal is to get it some what cleaned up before I leave. So there is one project for the next month.

In other news I am kinda sad that Borders is going out of business. I know they are expensive, but my library doesn't have much of a selection and Borders was a place where I could find anything I was looking for. I went to the one in Orland yesterday and just walked around, found gifts for my dad and sister which was good. My hope is that I can go back and scoop up clearance books for my own reading. I have sooooooooo many books and so many that I haven't read yet. I just haven't had time and when school starts I can't really read for fun at all. So maybe I will try and get one book finished before I head back. I feel overwhelmed and underwhelmed at the same time. I feel bored, but yet there is plenty to do. I guess I am just weird like that. Here's Hoping for Clarity!

P.S. Since I am so enchanted with my own bookshelf I decided to post a picture of the library from Beauty and the Beast...o childhood

Monday, July 18, 2011

Cleaning House

So I am finally cleaning my room today. Mind you that it isn't that dirty, just cluttered with all the college boxes I have refused to unpack. Most of it is going back to school with me in a month so I just don't see the point. But yesterday I got a new, taller bookshelf for my room and since I have no patience I have begun cleaning out the space so I can put up my new bookshelf. With this new handy bookshelf my dreams of becoming the Disney Princess Belle is finally coming true (she was the one who had the whole library and was a book worm in case you weren't aware). Nonetheless I am happy to have more storage for all my books and things. I just need to clean up whats left in my room and maybe one day I will get the desk I dream day. Any who I realize how much I just don't want to clean my room, I feel like I make little to know progress when I try. I admit I have way too much stuff. I need to get rid of a lot of it and I am trying. Currently I am working on donating things so that way I don't feel bad about getting rid of them. My closet is one thing that I know I need to go through, but its so hard to get rid of things, idk maybe I am weird but I just don't know when I might need something. I feel like its harder now because I am starting to get more nice clothes I can wear to school for observation and eventually student teaching. My closet is just overwhelmed. I really need to just purge my room of all the things I don't use so I can just have the basics. Eventually my room will be where I want it, but with the constant moving in and out of my room its hard to keep up. I know once I get it where I want it, it will be time to leave. Just thinking about it is exhausting. Time for a, I wish.

I do have a question though, why is it so hard to get rid of things. I find that I put so much into objects that is is so hard to part with them. Take for example stuffed animals, while some girls have two or three I have a bunch sitting on a futon in my room. I can't really part with them because they all have names and have a story, but its not like I play with them. They just sit in my room collecting dust and only a chosen two sit in my bed. How do you get rid of things like that, things you develop close attachments to but no longer enjoy as you once did? I think the saddest one I have isn't even a stuffed animal, its a hoodie. A boys hoodie that sits on a high shelf in my closet folded that I haven't worn since high school. It has good memories tied to it and I personally can't find the strength to throw it away or donate it and he won't take it back. I don't wear it because I feel a disconnect since I am no longer his girlfriend and he moved on, but for some reason every time I come across it I can't get rid of it.........................idk why........maybe its the memories, maybe its the pain of letting go, maybe its the fear that you won't remember...

P.S. I loved the book above when I was a kids, mainly because it reminded me of my

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Need You Now

Ok so I am listening to this song by Lady Antebellum. I am sure you have probably heard it even if you didn't realize it. Here's a link just in case though:

Any who I guess my point is that I completely relate to this song.
"Picture perfect memories
Scattered all around the floor
Reaching for the phone 'cause
I can't fight it anymore

And I wonder if I
Ever cross your mind
For me it happens all the time

It's a quarter after one
I'm all alone
And I need you now
Said I wouldn't call
But I've lost all control
And I need you now

And I don't know how
I can do without
I just need you now"

I guess the phone calls are the guys in my life I think I need or I cling to and call drunk or sober. I make the mistake when I am alone to cling to these boys instead of trying to busy my mind in other ways. When I'm bored I spend too much time thinking or if I'm alone I do the same thing. I hate the loneliness and the quiet day after day, so I end up calling boys who don't much care either way what happens to me. A part of me wishes these guys felt the same way I feel about them and really did care enough to be there for me as a friend at least, but I guess I ask too much. Nonetheless, I call the guys I try to avoid talking to all day and it normally goes down hill from there. Regardless of the time I loose control and try to have polite conversation with people who don't need me as much as I feel like I need them. I know I am better then that and at school I am fine, but being home with none of my college friends near its hard. I end up talking to old friends and people who are no good for me, but what is a social girl to do? I guess I would rather deal with the crap they throw at me then be alone, locked up in my room like a modern day Rapunzel. IDK

Friday, July 8, 2011

Looking Back

Ok, so I so happened to look through a yearbook today and let me tell you 2 things: 1) I don't miss high school. & 2)Time gives you a different perspective....if you doubt any of this I dare you to look back at your own yearbook, you might be surprised. I know that when I looked at it I realized how at the time you are so focused on everything surrounding high school: relationships, class, reputation, activities, friends, cliques, how you dress...all these things make up your world in these 4 years and you feel like you are being judged on all these things. You are in this high school bubble that you really don't grow out of till you graduate. Some people don't really grow out of that in college either, depending how they choose to act. I know that I was wrapped up in the high school bubble and didn't see the outside possibilities. I was given limited freedom in high school and college was just a whole different experience. I remember high school being a place of either great highs or epic lows, no middle ground really. I had friends and boyfriends, but I look back and wished I did somethings different. Not getting hung up on a boy who didn't deserve my attention for one and making more close friends would have been a start. I can't go back now though, I can only go forward. I started off college trying to fit, but I realized quickly I just have to be me. But who am I? In high school all I ever tried to be was the good friend, I never really looked at myself. College aloud me, almost forced me, to figure out who I am...mind you I am still working on it, but I have a direction. One thing I know now is there are gonna be people who dislike me and I am going to dislike certain people because of my personal thoughts, feelings, and values. Its gonna happen, but at least I am standing up for myself and for something instead of falling for everything (yes I stole that quote,but it fit perfectly). I am finding myself and trying to better myself as a whole person now. Finding true friends and people I connect to more so then I did before. High School is like another world to me now. I know some people look back and think of high school as this amazing time, but to me it was just a step. The amazing times are still to come, high school isn't my peak. I am looking up and out, I am optimistic!

Thursday, July 7, 2011

Super Behind

Its been a while...time to catch up. Ok, so I finished my book and I have yet to commit to another one, so if you know an amazing read let me know. Also, work has been...interesting...I have learned a lot about myself and children just based on this group of ten 6&7 year olds. These kids are great most of the time, but other times I wonder...lets just say some are hard of hearing. Nonetheless I am getting paid and doing something that I wanted to do, work with kids. Overall, my day consists of me entertaining them and getting them from one place to another, I am a babysitter for 3 hours twice a week. I am not complaining, but I feel like a babysitters job is harder then that of a teacher, in the sense that the children expect to have fun with you and basically make them happy while still doing what you have to do. As a teacher kids understand that school is a different environment where they come to learn and they know there are rules and consequences. The worst punishment they can get at camp is a time out...which doesn't do much, especially for the emotional kids. Idk, some days this job is great and other days I wonder what I got myself into, wonder if this will work and if I am even doing a good job. Time will tell...

In other news I went to the taste for the first time last weekend. Spent the Saturday driving up to my friends house and leaving there with myself and three friends of mine to take the CTA (another 1st for me). We walked the taste and shared amazing food, of course we went on the hottest day known to man, but happens. I would say I spent a good a good 4 hours there and then it just got too hot for me so me and a friend took the Metra home (this was not a 1st, but I now understand how the Metra works and what train I get on). No, I am not Chicagoan by far but maybe I am getting there...I know for sure that this is one mark in my book of experience and adventure so cheers to that.
Currently I am planning a zoo trip with some friends and possibly going to see some over the weekends. I have been so tired and my sleep cycle has been so weird that I just haven't worked out like I was, but I getting back to that. Trying to plan things for myself for the coming year, but if I learned one thing, nothing is for certain. Here's hoping best is to come!